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Offline PhantomBPR

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The Return to the hidden temples
« on: March 12, 2007, 06:47:58 PM »
Well I did it. Ancient Warrior and Ronin inspired me to go back to my Legends fanfiction. This is part one of my story, give me your input. If you like it, I'll write more. If you don't, I'll probably write more anyway and just give up halfway through. All and all, I had fun writing chapter 1 and I am excited about finishing this up.

Return to the hidden temples

Part 1: Agility
Chapter 1: The sighs of Sighs

Much of life has been devoted to archeology and mapping out the secrets of the ancient Mayan civilization?at least, that?s how it was. But as time passed on, I discovered a tribe by the same name of Mayan but of a completely different culture. They built large temples to honor their gods, each room with a different purpose, trap, and monster. As time went on, my research showed that this group had died out over the years, but its decedents had grown to be mastermind thieves. They?d go on journeys across the world, stealing objects of great value. They would return these objects to certain rooms of their temple and add the artifact?s story to their legacy. These stories became known as ?The Legends of the hidden temple?.

In 1993, an archeologist by the name of Kirk Fogg discovered this ancient civilization?s last earthly god, who took the name of Olmec. It is assumed that this god?s name is where the confusion of the tribes name came from and why they were designated as such. Olmec bestowed up on Kirk the knowledge of his race and the stories of the many artifacts that had entered the temple. Being the archeologist that he was, the artifacts meant a great deal to Kirk and he wished to take a few of them with him. He humbly asked for Olmec?s permission to remove some of the artifacts from the temple. Olmec agreed, but only on the terms that those without sin (children) where the ones to enter his temple. As such, they must first be tested on agility, knowledge, and strength, only then would they be allowed clearance into the temple. Depending on how much they exhibited the 3 qualities, pendants were issued as such. The remnants of the civilization that dwelled in the temple were given the mission to remove those that did not have proper clearance (sometimes, by eating them). For the three years, this ritual would continue, little by little, Kirk would receive few of the many artifacts of the temple, for many children, the temple proved to be too fierce a foe.

I was one of them. I was one of the lucky ones. I was one who won.

After the last artifact was attempted, Olmec decided that because a valiant attempt had been made on each artifact, that temple would be closed off to outsiders and would become sacred once again. Thirteen years past, Kirk once again ventured toward the temple. A very peculiar thing had begun to transpire. All of the artifacts that he had collected from the temple had been robed from the many institutions they were placed in. When he reached the temple, he met with a terrible site. Olmec, standing high and mighty, the great Olmec, keeper of the temple stood dead?if he could be called that, for he was an eternal spirit, but his earthly life force had been cut off. Kirk had kept this between himself an Olmec, but the truth behind Olmec?s earthly existence was three powerful orbs: The orb of agility, knowledge, and strength. Kirk had discovered that the civilization had returned, this time, in greater numbers. They were using Olmec?s sacred orbs, and dark arts as well to create awful magic, and steal back their many artifacts from historians and scientists.

Although Kirk felt that the artifacts did truly belong to them, he would not allow them to proses Olmec?s awesome magic, as such, he enlisted in the help of one mighty youth, his greatest student, and yours truly, the man clad in silver.

Our story begins one day as we were walking through a vast jungle. The journey had been a long troublesome one; with nothing to look forward too but the next cheese and crackers break. Kirk and I talked of a great many things along our journey, but the main topic was usually what my mission would be. Kirk had managed to gain 4 and half pendants that he had kept in his possession up until this point. These still acted as clearances through the temple, however, these would only work to keep the temple guards at bay, there was another defense mechanism I would need to fend off the darker spirits of the temple, and the evil mages who were controlling Olmec?s magic. Kirk handed me a long machete. Kirk explained that the three orbs had been hidden in three of the many temples. We would first be reclaiming the orb of agility.

Soon we approached a large cave that had several ledges within it. ?This is the cave of Sighs,? Kirk explained. ?The only secure entrance into the temple left in tact.? I was curious about the name of the cave. ?Why is it called the cave of Sighs?? I asked. Kirk smiled and said, ?Because the vibration of one sigh could cause the entire cave to collapse upon itself.? He said emotionlessly. ?What?!? I shouted, ?I could be killed if I barely cough!? ?Oh don?t worry.? Kirk said ?Save your adrenalin when you are fighting off the demons of the temple, you?ll fight better if you save it until then.? I shuddered at the thought. With no other choice, I walked passed the old torches whose golden flame had died long ago.

Before approaching the entrance to Sighs, I turned around and saw Kirk waving at me smiling. I gave him a look of question and asked, ?Aren?t you coming with me?? He shrugged and said. ?If there are more of two of us in Sighs at one time, it will collapse more easily, and as I said, the other entrance is closed off at this moment so this is our only choice.? I was perturbed but I knew that this was all for the greater good. I sighed, and then caught myself knowing that I couldn?t do that again once I entered the cave. I gave Kirk one last look and said quietly ?Wish me luck!? with that he nodded and I was off, one pendant in tow, and a machete on my belt.

I slowly but surely climbed my way through the many dark ledges of Sighs. I was convinced that there had to be something living in here, but then I realized that if there was, it would have collapsed under the vibrations of their growls or screeches, so I was most likely okay for that factor of danger. Of course, there was still the impending danger of the cave collapsing on me. I continued to make my way through the dark cavern; Kirk told me that the secret entrance into the temple would be marked. The problem was, I couldn?t see anything in front of my face, for all I knew, I was going in circles.

Suddenly, my feet picked up a good amount of dirt that caused a dust cloud. The dust flew up my nostrils and into my respiratory system, and then, I did the unthinkable, I sneezed, loudly. There was a huge rumbling, Kirk was right. I didn?t think the cave was that unstable, but now I was certain. Suddenly, the ceiling above me began to crumble. Little chunks of rock began to fall on my head, then larger rocks. As time went on, it got rougher. I knew I didn?t have much time left, I ran as fast as I could in no particular direction at all, praying Olmec would lead me down the right path.

With my hands flailing in every direction, they suddenly touched upon something that was not that of a rocky wall; it was that of an ancient button. I immediately realized that this was an ancient actuator. I pressed it, nothing happened. I feared it was all over, Kirk had warned me that some doors may be locked, but I thought my path was cleared. There was no way at this point I could make it up to the upper entrance to the temple, not this far into the game. I had to get through

I jammed my entire body into the wall, hitting the ancient button with all my might. This didn?t do much for the cave?s stability, but it did open the door. I tumbled through just as a large boulder crashed down and closed off the cave of Sighs from the temple forever. I had passed the cave of Sighs, but now a greater danger stood in my way.
A pit of quick sand stood at the bottom of whatever this ancient structure had once been. It separated the entrance from the main temple, and the only way across it was an old bridge. And it looked troublesome.

To be continued.

All coments welcome.
Crazy, but that's how it goes.

You don't do nothing you don't wanna do
Be nothing phony about you
Keeping it real and do what you feel
You gotta eat
You gott eat Checkers!

Offline The Ancient Warrior

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The Return to the hidden temples
« Reply #1 on: March 13, 2007, 01:48:57 AM »
Sweet, I love it so far.  Keep it up!
If you have seen all 120 full episodes of Legends, copy and paste this into your profile for all to see.

The Room of the Ancient Warriors | Legends: The Rediscovery (Season 3 resumption date TBD)





Favorite episode: The Levitating Dog Leash of Nostradamus
Favorite season: Season 2, very closely followed by Season 3
Favorite team: Blue Barracudas


Credit to Nicklegends for the screencap in the avatar and for Mr. Blue.  Thanks dude!

Offline PhantomBPR

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The Return to the hidden temples
« Reply #2 on: March 16, 2007, 02:19:28 PM »
Ok, I started mapping out how I wanted to do this story, and I decided I wanted to make a big change to it. Instead of having myself as the main character of the story, I wanted to change the main character to Zac Turney. I'd also have a few other characters from his goldmine map episode appear in the story, so I'm going to have to edit the first chapter a little bit. Had I known I was going to do this before hand, I would have put a little more into the first chapter, but seeing as how you guys are all such Legends fans, you won't have any trouble following along.
Crazy, but that's how it goes.

You don't do nothing you don't wanna do
Be nothing phony about you
Keeping it real and do what you feel
You gotta eat
You gott eat Checkers!

Offline The Ancient Warrior

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The Return to the hidden temples
« Reply #3 on: March 16, 2007, 02:27:07 PM »
Which proves to me that's it's okay to write my story without getting consent of the real-game players to use them as characters.
If you have seen all 120 full episodes of Legends, copy and paste this into your profile for all to see.

The Room of the Ancient Warriors | Legends: The Rediscovery (Season 3 resumption date TBD)





Favorite episode: The Levitating Dog Leash of Nostradamus
Favorite season: Season 2, very closely followed by Season 3
Favorite team: Blue Barracudas


Credit to Nicklegends for the screencap in the avatar and for Mr. Blue.  Thanks dude!

Offline PhantomBPR

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The Return to the hidden temples
« Reply #4 on: March 16, 2007, 05:58:11 PM »
Quote from: ""The Ancient Warrior""
Which proves to me that's it's okay to write my story without getting consent of the real-game players to use them as characters.


I don't see any problem with it. People write fanficton about celebrities, I don't think anyone is about to get mad about it. Even so, it would only be a matter of taking the story off of the internet, you would not have to delete it all together.

EDIT: 2 things I've decided about this.

1. I'm going to change the names for this story
2. I'm going to make a disclaimer saying that all use of names of actual people is purely for fictional use.
Crazy, but that's how it goes.

You don't do nothing you don't wanna do
Be nothing phony about you
Keeping it real and do what you feel
You gotta eat
You gott eat Checkers!

Offline PhantomBPR

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The Return to the hidden temples
« Reply #5 on: March 17, 2007, 07:05:28 PM »
Ok, here is chapter 2. Sorry if the quality sucks, but I had to make so many changes to it this last week, and I had to email it back and forth depending on what computer I was using to work on it. All and all, I think it turned out well, here it is:

Chapter 2: Bridge Troubles

I stood in a window of a tall ruined structure, whatever this part of the temple once was; it was not any longer, for a huge opening lay in its southern wall. I looked through the opening and I could see the image of Kirk. I waved to him to reassure that I had not died in the collapse of the cave. He waved back and shouted encouragement. This had to be the largest part of the temple. The main part of the temple was on the other side of the bridge, but it looked to be about two or three yards away. Perhaps this was originally some sort of burial chamber or something to that extent. I decided that I should stop worrying about what the room once was, and start worrying about the present, for I had a bridge to cross, and I had come to it.

I slowly stood up, upon the ruins that I was kneeling on, and began to
summon my strength. The temperature had dropped, and the winds were
starting to pick up. I could feel the pierce of the cold wind against my
body. The fear of the bridge was an ominous demon within myself that
would kill me if I let it. I had to gain my composure. I held my breath
and took my first step onto the bridge. I met with horror.

Upon putting the weight of my foot on the bridge, it caused a dramatic
shift of gravity for the bridge. This troubled bridge had not been
crossed in eons, it was not used to such tension. But that wasn?t the
main problem. No, compared to what happened next, crossing that bridge was
not the worst bridge I had to cross. I saw a red flash out the corner
of my eye. It was fast at first, and I thought it might just be a trick
of the light on my weary eyes, but it slowly became more solid as it
slowed down. I realized that some one or something was jumping around the
walls of the ruined building that surrounded the quicksand.

At long last the figure finally revealed itself for who it was. It
landed on the far side of the bridge. It was at this point I realized that
the bridge itself was not really that long of a distance but that my
mind and my fear had made it seem like miles to cross.  As terrible as
the next event was, looking back I can?t help but think that it aided
me in conquering my fear of the bridge. The figure stood standing tall
and proud at the far side of the bridge. He cocked his head up and
smirked at me, I never thought I?d see him again. My rival, the man clad
in red.

When I originally competed in the temple games years ago to see if I
was eligible to enter the temple, I went up against this fiery lad. The
color of his garments truly personified his personality. I had beaten
him years ago in the games; I never imagined he?d grow sore with me.
But those long years had established a powerful rage within him. On
those nights where his mind kept him awake, I?m sure he reminisced to
those times, but it proved to be no nostalgia, only regretful rage.

He took something out of his belt and pointed at me. It was a knife...no; it was more of a dagger. He then moved his thumb across the base of it, and two separate blades protruded from the main blade. This led me to believe that it was a knife. I began to put things together.  Perhaps
he had returned to the temple seeking revenge. I realized that if I
didn't say something soon I might find myself in more troubles than a
troubled bridge ever offered to me. I gathered up my wits, took a deep
breath and asked the age old question:

"Why are you here?" he laughed and gave the age-old answer.
"So we meet again." He then began laughing like it was the funniest thing
in the entire world. I soon remembered the time I spent with this man
during my time in the games, I remembered his personality, and I began
to feel the rage as well. He continued to laugh. I grew angry. ?I
asked you a question, damn it!? I yelled at his face. "Dear boy." He
began with a sly voice. "It should be I who is asking you why you are
present here. Our time here was years ago, not now. There is nothing
left for you here, you should turn back before you fall victim to the
temples pitfalls." Despite my anger, I began to grow a bit curious.

"If you claim that there is nothing left for me here, why did you
return?" I asked, trying to remain angry and assertive. "I've been
waiting for you." He said simply. He then launched himself into the
air above the bridge and then began throwing several of his knives at
me. I leaped to avoid them and found my entire body falling upon the middle of the bridge. I had fallen for his trap. The troubled bridge could take no more and its ropes gave way. I grabbed onto the wooden floor boards for dear life. Red merely laughed and leaped towards the temple. If his objective was the same as mine, he had the lead for the orb.

I knew I was running out of time so I had to act fast. I was lucky to had landed far enough onto the bridge that when it gave way, the fraction that I was on swung toward the temple. It crashed against the old stonewall, causing several boards to fall into the quicksand below. I attempted to climb up the bridge but the boards wouldn?t support my weight. I felt that all hope was lost, but then I saw that I had one chance. It was slim, but it was my only chance.

There was another opening in the stonewall that would lead to the upper levels of the temple. It would be a detour from my original path, but I saw no other way. With one swift move, I scurried up the bridge, grabbing a foot board and then jumping from it, all in a semi second. I then made one last leap of faith and grabbed onto the opening. I clung there for what felt like forever, but I somehow found the strength to hoist myself up.

I had survived yet another trap of the temple. But my journey was taking a turn for the worst. If the mages had my rival on their side, they?d defiantly have the upper hand. He was out for my blood; he wanted revenge for my stealing his glory all those years back. I wasn?t about to try to make sense of it. I decided to keep going and keep my eyes on the prize. My goal was the orb of agility, and so far, agility was what had kept me alive.
Crazy, but that's how it goes.

You don't do nothing you don't wanna do
Be nothing phony about you
Keeping it real and do what you feel
You gotta eat
You gott eat Checkers!

Offline Turbo Barracuda

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The Return to the hidden temples
« Reply #6 on: March 21, 2007, 07:51:23 AM »
NIIIIIIIICCCCCEEEEEEEE!   :D  :D  :D  :)

Offline PhantomBPR

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The Return to the hidden temples
« Reply #7 on: March 24, 2007, 10:05:06 PM »
Get it while it's hot! Your saturday night fix of "Return to the hidden temples"! Chapter 3 is up! All comments welcome.

Chapter 3: An Observant Ghost

Having just escaped certain death for the second time that day, I found myself climbing a long staircase that lead into the main temple. If you will recall, I had just had a run in with my rival who I had not seen since we competed in the Temple Games long ago. As I climbed I remembered the words he had spoken to me not long ago. He told me he had been waiting for me. Waiting for me? He knew I was coming here? How was that possible? I decided not to harp on it. Now that I was in the main fraction of the temple I?d have to deal with guards and the mages who had invaded the temple.

I was lucky enough to have chosen a guard free room. As I ascended the staircase I came face to face with an old stone door. The lock had broken off long ago and the door was cracked. I could see a blue glowing light emitting from the opening of the door. I pushed the door open a little further to see what could cause such a strange glow. I met with yet another horror.

As I walked into the room I discovered that it was an ancient observatory and one of the few rooms left in good condition. The sundial was still in tact, the room showed no huge signs of neglect, and the roof of this room was glass with star constellations painted on it to correspond with the sky. However, none of this is what horrified me. The horror was what I had discovered that was emitting the blue light. Across the room, sitting in the corner, or rather floating, was that of a ghost.

I do not lie to you, I have seen many things in my life, many strange and terrible things, but this was in fact a ghost. I withdrew my machete from my belt again and pointed it at the apparition, as if it might attack, as if it were a tangible being. But it merely signaled at me to put my sword back, as if it meant no harm. I was cautious at first, but then I realized that it meant no harm. I put my machete back in its sheath and I approached this terrifying figure.

It was the ghost of an old man in a hooded robe. He had a long beard and looked much like a monk. I took my chances with it and decided to ask. ?What are you?? It responded with. ?I am a soul that could not pass on from this world. I am forever bound to this planet. I have a bond to this temple as well.? I gave it a questioned look and it responded. ?I sinned a great sin in my life, my eternal damnation?or rather, penance, is to help those who may also stray down the same path as I did. If I complete this goal, then I may pass onward to the afterlife, whatever it is that awaits me.?

I was amazed, I had been through one of the temples, and I had seen the magic, but I had never imagined that I would find the essence of a soul in the temple. He then stared into my eyes for a brief period, as if he were reading my mind. ?Perhaps I can help you as well, young silver clad individual.? He said. ?What can you help me with?? I asked quizzically. He motioned for me to follow him. We walked toward the center of the room where the sundial sat. The ghost hovered and then slowly descended to floor and crossed its ghostly legs. (In case you are wondering, it did not posses a ghost tail as many legends of ghosts place them with tails.)

?Come and meditate with me.? He said quietly. I grew impatient, I had a mission to complete, and I could not spend time idle, meditating with an old dead fool. ?I have no time for your other worldly stress relief!? I thundered at him. ?I am here for a reason.? The ghost did not flinch. I made my way across the room to the opposing the door that would lead me further into the temple. I was just about to open it when he said, ?If you can not control your anger, how do you ever plan to best the mages?? I froze. How could he know about that? It seemed that everyone knew more than they should. I spun around and yelled back ?What do you know?? he chuckled to himself. ?I know a great many things, I know everything the gods know?at least now that I am a soul and not mortal.?

I looked at this as a chance to gain some information on my mission but before I could ask he said ?The only thing I can tell you is that if you continue on in the condition you are in now, you will easily fall to the perils ahead.? I remained silent and became thoughtful. What could that mean? The condition I was in. I had a few cuts from my recent scuffles but nothing major.  The phantom began to speak again. ?The anger you posses within, the hatred of your rival, the wrath you hold on your shoulders. It will do you in, in the long run.? I approached him and asked. ?How can I avoid it?? He motioned for me to sit down.

I crossed my legs and closed my eyes. He instructed me to think deeply. As I thought, I fell into a dream like state. I had an out of body experience. I felt as if I had entered my soul and was flying around the room. I then ascended out of the temple and through the glass roof. As this was occurring, I noticed that sundial was spinning madly, as if some one had spun it that had little time on their hands. I rose above the clouds and into the stars. There I met with the ghost again face to face. ?My name is Malakai, several years ago I was a monk at this temple. I had a huge responsibility. Not only was I a monk but I was a guard as well, my job was to stand sentry at the observatory and make sure that no one intruded onto this sacred ground. But there came a day when invaders came. They trudged upon our lands and attacked our temple. I had been careless during that fraction of my life because I was angry at my current situation. I?ll spare you the details of my life and tell you that it was anger that did me in, and if you are not careful, anger will do you in as well.?

I wondered who the invaders could have been. Kirk had discovered these temples only 13 years earlier, it couldn?t have been him. ?There is a new threat to our temple. You know as well as I do that the monks have sapped Olmec of his earthly power. Without the orbs, Olmec is but a stone head, forever silent. I give you my word that he still lives on in the realm of the gods, but he needs power on Earth as well. Young silver? He said, looking me directly eye to eye now ?We are depending on you to rescue the orbs and return Olmec to his former glory. It is a huge task, and I know it must be difficult, but you are one of the few who can do it. I have faith that you will succeed if you let go of your anger. Release your aggression, and fight only on instinct.? I understood what he said, but I wasn?t quite sure if I could do it.

?Good luck savior.? He said. With that I fell unconscious and returned to my body. As I awoke, I found myself in a pitch-black room. I felt around and then hit my head on something. As I got up to examine, I realized it was the sundial?s pedestal. I was back in the observatory. As I looked up to the ceiling, I noticed a small amount of light was shining in from the rising moon; however, the blue glow was gone, as was the ghost. I was a bit frightened that he may still be there, hiding. Perhaps he made himself microscopic and was sitting in the corner, waiting to jump out. I had to put these childish fears away. What he told me was true though. If I wanted to get through this temple alive, I would have to think clearly, I could not let my mind be clouded with anger, it almost killed me on the bridge.

With this new fact in mind I decided it was time for me to press onward on my quest. At least that was my intention until I realized that the door leading out was locked. I was a bit annoyed but I remembered to keep my cool and not be quick to anger. I walked around toward the sundial and began to concentrate. As I did, I put my hand on the sundial and leaned on it. It began to turn, and I heard an opening. I pushed it again until it rotated a full 360 degrees on its pedestal.  I soon found that I had opened a trap door in the middle of the floor.

I had a new path cleared for me, and my adventure would now continue. I would not forget Malakai?s words of wisdom that night. Keep my cool and not be fast to anger. I?m not quite sure if it would help me in my quest, it may even have an opposite effect, but I trusted him, perhaps calmness and agility were meant to work together. With these two linked, I could make the most out of my adrenalin and use my extra energy to complete my quest. And if what Malakai said was right, I was about to be using a good amount of adrenalin indeed.
Crazy, but that's how it goes.

You don't do nothing you don't wanna do
Be nothing phony about you
Keeping it real and do what you feel
You gotta eat
You gott eat Checkers!

Offline PhantomBPR

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The Return to the hidden temples
« Reply #8 on: April 01, 2007, 05:26:28 PM »
I got a little behind on this because of the April fools gag, but Spring Break is coming up, and I'm going to get a good chunk of it done during my time off, might even finish part 1 all together.
Crazy, but that's how it goes.

You don't do nothing you don't wanna do
Be nothing phony about you
Keeping it real and do what you feel
You gotta eat
You gott eat Checkers!

Offline PhantomBPR

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The Return to the hidden temples
« Reply #9 on: April 16, 2007, 06:42:39 PM »
Sorry it's been taking me so long, but here is chapter 4.

Chapter 4: Columns

I proceeded down the trap door that revealed a long ladder. The ladder went connected down a long dark tunnel that seemed to stretch on for eternity. Having just had a ethereal hypnosis, my mind was not exactly connected with the path ahead. I tried to keep alert as I slowly descended the ladder. At long last, I came to a touch down point where a large wooden door stood with a metallic latch attached to the wall. I quickly undid the latch and opened the door.

Behind the door I was met with astonishment. I had seceded in reaching the center of the temple, the main building. I stood in a huge golden room with columns that stretched high to the ceiling, the length of which I climbed down behind the room?s walls. The size of this room suggested perhaps a court room or congregational hall in its prime. Whatever it was, now it was darkened, lightened only by a few sparse torches and my own personal flashlight. At least now I had reached the main building and could now begin looking for the orb of agility.

It was then that I realized perhaps my luck was returning. On the far side of the room, something caught my eye, a golden glimmer. Upon examination of the glimmer, I realized it was being admitted from a pedestal. I dashed across the room to examine it further. To my awe, I discovered that this was the orb of agility! I had seceded in my mission; all I must do now is go back the way I came. And all without running into any temple guards or mages, things were starting to turn around?. at least, that?s how it seemed.

From the instant I grabbed the orb from its pedestal, a terrible thing began to occur, the entire room began to shake. Without hesitating I raced across the room towards the large golden front doors. The entire room began to collapse upon me. The many golden columns that lined the room were quickly crashing towards the ground. Gravity had never been on my side.

I continued racing across the room. A column nearly crushed me as it tore a bit of my shirt off my back in the process. I don?t know how I kept going, it seemed I was one inch from the destruction that was chasing me. Whatever sort of trap this was, it was not afraid of taking the whole room out with me. And so I continued running, no matter how inevitable it felt.

Halfway through, I cocked my head back around to check on the debris status. Huge clouds of smoke were erupting from the wreckage. The roof had begun to cave in, it was slowly sliding for what little of the building was left. Not much time left. I was nearly towards the door when a huge stone fixture fell from the ceiling. I had to jump over it to avoid tripping. I saw it for a split second, but that?s all it took to register in my mind. It was the sundial from the observatory above this room.

With one leap of faith, I bounded across the room and rammed into the golden doors. They opened, surprisingly simply and sent me out towards a balcony over looking the jungle. The balcony was about 12 feet wide and made of stone so it gave me enough room to avoid the final destruction of what once was a great hall. Now it was a hall of fallen columns. I had survived, now all I must do is repel down the balcony, and my first mission would be complete. ?Ahaaaa!?   And that?s when it happened.

I heard a low growing noise from the right hand side of the balcony; I turned toward it and saw several figures in hooded robes. I stood there eyeing each one of them, then one in green approached me and shot his arm out demanding the orb. When I refused it he extended a large sword outward. I then produced my machete and prepared myself for combat, however, it was all for naught, for he knew how to use this orb, he was a mage.

The instant he touched the orb, he became as fast as the speed of light. I only saw a quick flash, but what I saw was very troubling. He raced back through the ruined building just before it collapsed completely, racing through a large hole that had formed in the room?s destruction, heading for the bowels of the temple. There was no outer entry to those levels. I spun around in anticipation of one of the other mages to make their move, however they had all disappeared.

My luck had stayed the same, I was no closer now than I had ever been, in fact, I was farther. But my agility had once again saved my life, if only it would have held out for a little while longer. All hope was not loosed however, I knew from the ancient maps that Kirk showed me of this temple, that one could access the lower levels via the old elevators, however, that was on the far side of the temple, and I would have to cross the entire structure now. My hope was falling faster than those columns.
Crazy, but that's how it goes.

You don't do nothing you don't wanna do
Be nothing phony about you
Keeping it real and do what you feel
You gotta eat
You gott eat Checkers!

Offline The Ancient Warrior

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The Return to the hidden temples
« Reply #10 on: April 17, 2007, 09:12:19 AM »
Just wondering, do you know how many chapters there's gonna be in Part 1?
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Offline PhantomBPR

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The Return to the hidden temples
« Reply #11 on: April 17, 2007, 04:43:44 PM »
Quote from: ""The Ancient Warrior""
Just wondering, do you know how many chapters there's gonna be in Part 1?


12 for each 3 parts.

12X3=36 all together.
Crazy, but that's how it goes.

You don't do nothing you don't wanna do
Be nothing phony about you
Keeping it real and do what you feel
You gotta eat
You gott eat Checkers!

Offline The Rock Quarry

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The Return to the hidden temples
« Reply #12 on: May 06, 2007, 07:36:31 AM »
Are you going to continue this?

Offline PhantomBPR

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The Return to the hidden temples
« Reply #13 on: May 06, 2007, 07:52:58 AM »
Quote from: ""The Rock Quarry""
Are you going to continue this?


Thought I might get this question since I started a shorter story today, yes I will, I'm going to finish this one, don't worry.
Crazy, but that's how it goes.

You don't do nothing you don't wanna do
Be nothing phony about you
Keeping it real and do what you feel
You gotta eat
You gott eat Checkers!

Offline PhantomBPR

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The Return to the hidden temples
« Reply #14 on: May 22, 2007, 08:24:04 PM »
I promise you I will finish what I start, no matter how long it takes me. Here is chapter 5:



Chapter 5: Forbidden Treasures

If you will recall, I was not having the best of luck thus far. Well, perhaps I am ungrateful I am still alive. After having survived a cave in, a run in with my adversary, a supernatural encounter, and the collapse of a grand hall, I was still nowhere closer to reclaiming the first orb than I was when I started. Hell, I was farther, after my last little mishap the Mages had succeeded in transporting the orb to the lower levels of the temple. Now I had to traverse the temple in its entirety, every trap, every hardship, and every mayhem it could hold for me.

The only other access to the bottom levels of the temple was an ancient elevator system created by the ancient civilization over a millennium ago. There was no guarantee of its existence, but it was the best lead I had at this point. Though things did look grim, I had to press onward; I had a mission to complete. Olmec?s power on this planet was riding on my shoulders.

I navigated my way from the remainder of the stone balcony that was connected to the main tower of the temple, over to a narrow ledge with no railing. I slowly but surely inched my way across to the other side of the temple, making sure I did not fall. Once on the other side I came face to face with a large stone door. Like most of the other security structures in this temple, it was old and molding, so a swift kick sent me onward on my adventure.

The door revealed a large dark room, lit only by the moon light flooding in from the opening. All that it illuminated was the yellow stone floor of the room. I walked into the room ever so slowly. This room was very silent, as I walked, my footsteps echoed, one, by one, by one. The farther in I walked, the darker it became.

Suddenly, to my horror, the opening that provided my only source of light was shut off. A stone panel had come down taking the place of the door I had kicked open earlier. Now I was trapped within this room with no light at all. I had no sense of direction, much less what this room held in store for me.

As I walked further into the room I began to notice that my footsteps no longer held the same echo. As my feet touched the floor, I would hear a metallic clanging noise. Upon investigation, I discovered that there were several jewels and precious stones on the floor. I had walked right into an ancient vault, a treasure room.

Not long after this, I was met with another surprise. A light had appeared, illuminating the far side of the room. This did not bode well for me, so far nearly every being I had met in this temple proved to be an enemy, I even had my doubts about Malikai. The light was getting closer and closer to me. I wasn?t about to take my chances. I ran across the room, my footsteps loudly echoing. ?Damn it!? I thought to myself. Too late to stop now.

I didn?t dare look back, I knew whoever it was, they were on my tail now. Suddenly, luck was on my side again. There was enough light in the room for me to make out a large treasure chest near the far side of the room, if I could just make it into the box, I might lead my chasers astray. I was coming up on the box. Its lid was down so I would have to be quick about it. I dove toward the box and attempted to lift the lid at the same time, but it was all in vain.

My captors grabbed me by the shoulder, spun me around, and held a knife to my neck. The torch revealed their faces?or what I could see of their faces. They were large masked individuals clad in headdresses and feathers as well as primitive looking armor. I knew from my studies that these were the guardians of this temple. There were three of them in total. I think I had learned enough about agility at this point to save my ass without trouble by now, but my mishap with the treasure box lead me to believe otherwise.

What they didn?t know was that I had a machete on my belt. With a quick swing of faith, I sliced across their stomachs, giving me a chance to escape, but as I dove to toward the end of the treasure room, one of the guards thrust his knife into my shoulder. I sprawled into the next room. To my luck, the guards were retreating to tend to their wounds. Apparently they came into battle not expecting to have to treat such deep cuts. Unfortunately, so had I. This knife did some damage to me. If I didn?t act soon, I might bleed to death. My agility had saved me again, but it came with a price. However, hope was returning, in the form of a silver light.
Crazy, but that's how it goes.

You don't do nothing you don't wanna do
Be nothing phony about you
Keeping it real and do what you feel
You gotta eat
You gott eat Checkers!