Author Topic: The Missing Shoe and Driving Glove of Joey Hand  (Read 1176 times)

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Offline mikeofnash

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The Missing Shoe and Driving Glove of Joey Hand
« on: July 10, 2006, 09:06:02 PM »
Season 4, Episode 25

The episode opens the same way as they did in season 3, but Kirk comes on stage by popping out of the Quicksand Bog, and walking to the Steps of Knowledge.

Kirk: Thank you very much. Nice to see you, nice to see you, Olmec. Welcome to Legends of the Hidden Temple. The rooms are filled with lost treasures that are protected by mysterious Mayan temple guards. Only Olmec knows the legend behind treasure in the temple. Which one are we going to hear about today?

Olmec: The Legend of the Missing Shoe and Driving Glove of Joey Hand.

Kirk: Oh, the Missing Shoe and Driving Glove of Joey Hand. Well, one of these teams will have a chance to retrieve the missing shoe and driving glove.

*Kirk introduces the teams, does the "they'll have to..." speech.*

Offline mikeofnash

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The Missing Shoe and Driving Glove of Joey Hand
« Reply #1 on: July 10, 2006, 09:11:19 PM »
The moat crossing was the simple grab-the-rope and swing across round. Each team's first player made it across on the first attempt, and their partners quickly followed. The Red Jaguars rang in first, the Blue Barracudas second, the Purple Parrots third, and the Green Monkeys fourth. The Silver Snakes and the Orange Iguanas get a package of Oscar Mayer bologna for trying, but wait! The judges confer after looking at the video from the SteadiCam on the side of the moat where the gongs are, and picked up the second Red Jaguar skidding her right foot across the water while swinging. They are disqualified, and the Silver Snakes move onto the Steps of Knowledge.

Offline mikeofnash

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The Missing Shoe and Driving Glove of Joey Hand
« Reply #2 on: July 10, 2006, 09:23:34 PM »
Kirk: Now it's time for Olmec to tell us about the Legend of yadda, yadda, yadda. But pay attention, blah-blah-blah, because your knowledge, hee-dee, hee-dee, hee, could, doo-bee, doo-bee, doo.

Olmec: One of America's young up-and-coming sports car drivers is 27-year-old Joey Hand. Joey raced in the Toyota Atlantic Series, the last rung on the ladder to the Champ Car World Series, in the early part of the 21st century, and saw some success, but couldn't move up to the top level, so he went in a different direction. He currently races for BMW in the Grand American Road Racing Rolex Series. In 2005, Joey won four times, and finished fifth in the points. But on June 25, 2006, during a race at the Mid-Ohio Sports Car Course in Lexington, Joey was involved in a hideous crash, when his car slid into the grass near the starting line, jumped a newly-paved section of road, and rolled over forward at least 8 times, flipping across the track (video here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CiZ9Wc1yh8s&search=Joey%20Hand). Thankfully, Joey was OK.

Course marshal: Hey, Joey, you all right? Man, was that bad.

Joey: Yeah, I'm fine. Banged up a bit, but I'm fine.

Course marshal: Well, let's get you to the ambulance to take you to the hospital just to make sure.

During the accident, Joey's right shoe and right glove somehow flew out of the car. Your quest is to find the missing shoe and driving glove of Joey Hand, and bring it back here.

*It's in The Room of the Secret Password.*

Offline mikeofnash

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The Missing Shoe and Driving Glove of Joey Hand
« Reply #3 on: July 10, 2006, 09:45:12 PM »
Steps of Knowledge questions:
1) At what famous American road course did Joey's accident occur -- Road America, Mid-Ohio Sports Car Course, or Watkins Glen International?

Silver Snakes answered the question correctly.

2) What make of car was he driving -- BMW, Toyota, or Jaguar?

Silver Snakes again answered correctly.

3) In which open wheel series did Joey Hand race in before moving to Grand Am -- the IRL IndyCar Series, the Toyota Atlantic Series, or the Star Mazda Series?

Blue Barracudas answered correctly.

4) In American motor racing, particularly NASCAR, which flag signals a for a slower driver to move over and let a faster driver pass -- the white flag, the black flag, or the blue flag with a yellow diagonal stripe?

Silver Snakes answered correctly once more, and qualified for the Temple Games.

5) Which star of ABC's popular series, Grey's Anatomy, occasionally races in the Grand Am Cup Series -- T.R. Knight, James Pickens, Jr., or Patrick Dempsey?

Purple Parrots answered correctly.

6. What is the world's most popular form of motor racing -- NASCAR, Formula One, or NHRA drag racing?

Blue Barracudas answered correctly.

7. Of these three races with a distance of 500, which race is a distance of 500 kilometers, not miles -- the Pocono 500, the Indianapolis 500, or the Subway Fresh 500?

Blue Barracudas answered correctly, putting a quick end to this round.

Here is the parting gift for the Green Monkeys and Purple Parrots:

Dee Bradley Baker: You'll have hours and hours of fun playing with this Donald Trump doll! The world's greatest billionaire who has seen many of his own businesses go bankrupt now fits in the palm of your hand! Pull the string, and he'll say, "You're fired!" in hundreds of languages, from English to Swahili! And he'll say it in all sorts of different accents, from Jamacian (You're fired, mon!) to Canadian (You're fired, eh?) to Australian (You're fired, mate!) to mafia don (Ya fired. Now, don't tell anyone we had this conversation, or I'll have you whacked!) and Ebonics (Yo' ass is fired, bee-yotch!)! The Donald Trump doll, from Ban Dai!

Offline mikeofnash

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The Missing Shoe and Driving Glove of Joey Hand
« Reply #4 on: July 10, 2006, 10:15:47 PM »
The Temple Games, and these will feature a historic first: a Temple Game outdoors, although there will be two Games outdoors. It's a beautiful, sunny day. For the Silver Snakes, we have Miles and JoAnn. He's one of the top high school baseball prospects in Des Moines, and she's a spelling bee champ from Bangor. And the Blue Barracudas have Kevin, who lives in San Diego, and loves surfing, and Audrey, who lives in Charlotte, and enjoys watching the films of her glamourously famous namesake, Audrey Hepburn.

Kirk then talks about the pendants, and there's twist in the rules: a team that goes to the Temple with one or one-and-a-pendants will gain a half-pendant as a bonus for making it to the Temple, provided they win at least two Temple Games outright. Here's Temple Game #1, taking place in the backlot behind the studio:

Olmec: Joey Hand's crash occurred at the Mid-Ohio Sports Car Course, one of the toughest road courses in the U.S. In this Game, you'll hop into go-karts, and race on a much smaller version of the course, lined with hay bales on both sides. When Kirk waves the green flag, take off towards turn one. Be careful not to go off-course! The first player to complete five laps, or the player that's further along in 60 seconds wins! But there are two things to remember: at Mid-Ohio, there are separate start and finish lines, so even though the race will begin in a much different spot, the first lap will be complete when you reach the finish line, and if you intentionally spin your opponent, the race will immediately be abandoned, and your opponent will be declared the winner. (Mid-Ohio looks like this: http://grandamerican.com/Images/Track/Track_Midohio_130.gif)

The race is close, but approaching the finish line to start final lap, Miles spins, leaving Kevin in the clear. But in the first turn past the start line, Kevin brakes too late, and goes WAY off-course, putting Miles in the clear. But while making the last turn to the checkered flag, Miles spins, backing into some hay bales. His kart stalls, and the spotters have to help him. He gets it restarted, just as Kevin approaches the last turn. Miles quickly mashes down the gas, but Kevin beats him to the line by a nose in the wildest, most exciting Temple Game ever!

Blue Barracudas: 1/2 pendant, Silver Snakes: yet to score.

Temple Game #2, this one indoors:

Olmec: Even if you're not a motor racing fan, you know what some of the flags mean. But do you know what ALL of them mean? When Kirk gives the signal, take a flag, and place it next to its correct description. The first player to correctly place all eight flags on the board, or the player that's further along at the end of 60 seconds wins!

This flag means there is one lap left in the race: white flag.
This flag means the race has been stopped: red flag.
This flag means the race has started or restarted: green flag.
This flag means that the race is over: checkered flag.
This flag means that a driver's score is no longer being taken because they refuse to go to the pits to serve a penalty: black flag with white "X."
This flag means that a driver is being penalized: black flag.
This flag means that an accident has taken place, and that all drivers must slow down right away: yellow flag.
This flag means that a slower driver must move over and allow the faster driver through: blue flag with yellow diagonal stripe.

JoAnn gets seven flags correct to Audrey's five.

Half-a-pendant apiece. Back outdoors for the final Temple Game:

Olmec: In most forms of motor racing, a quick pit stop is everything. In sports car racing, though, it means so much more, as some pit stops will utilize a driver change while the usual tire change and refuelling takes place. When Kirk waves the green flag, drive your go-kart up to your pit crew. When one of your crew members grabs onto the back of the kart to keep it in place, quickly get out of the kart, and allow your partner to jump in, but help them put on their seat belt. When the pit stop is complete, drive to the finish line. The first player to complete all aspects of the pit stop and cross the finish line wins!

This game is never close. JoAnn can't get her belt to latch, and Kevin sprints out of the pits quickly after the driver exchange, refuelling and tire change, helping the Blue Barracudas get to the Temple, and gain the half-pendant bonus for winning their two Temple Games outright.

Offline mikeofnash

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The Missing Shoe and Driving Glove of Joey Hand
« Reply #5 on: July 10, 2006, 10:46:37 PM »
The Temple Run. The only room that's changed in the Temple from season three is The Room of the Ancient Warriors, which is now The Room of The Three Floor Lights (see the "Make Up Your Own Room" thread).

The Run: Audrey goes in first, heading for the Ledges. She runs into a Temple Guard, and goes into The Pit with no pendant. She knocks the column down with her hands, and quickly enters the Tomb of the Headless Kings, but is taken out by a second Temple Guard. Kevin is fast! Upon sight of the second Guard, he dashes up the stairs for the Ledges, quickly gets through the Tomb, has some trouble at the Jester's Court, but figures it out. He plows straight through the wall into the Quicksand Bog, goes up the slide into the Room of the Secret Password, grabs the shoe and glove, and dashes out of the Temple with 1:03 remaining! And the fireworks exploded from the top level of the third tier of the center shaft.

For getting to the Temple, they get a boombox, a new bike for getting the artifacts, and a trip to Rome for getting out of the Temple.

Offline mikeofnash

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The Missing Shoe and Driving Glove of Joey Hand
« Reply #6 on: July 10, 2006, 10:55:42 PM »
Name of Artifact(s): The Missing Shoe and Driving Glove of Joey Hand
Season: 4
Layout: 9
Result: Made it!
Time remaining: 1:03
Team: Blue Barracudas
Pendants won: 1-and-a-half
Artifacts' location: Room of the Secret Password



Offline dshban

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The Missing Shoe and Driving Glove of Joey Hand
« Reply #7 on: July 10, 2006, 11:20:32 PM »
:D Nice one. I want a Donald Trump doll!

Offline mikeofnash

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The Missing Shoe and Driving Glove of Joey Hand
« Reply #8 on: July 14, 2006, 09:40:51 AM »
After this episode aired, Kirk won a national powerball lotto worth more than $700 million, bought all of Wales, renamed it Foggyland, and retired there. I took over as host of season five, and Kelly was brought in in a Bob Barker's Beauties-style role, showing off the insanely crappy prizes.

Offline dshban

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The Missing Shoe and Driving Glove of Joey Hand
« Reply #9 on: July 14, 2006, 01:13:51 PM »
:D:D:D