Legends Episode Ranking System - COMPLETE

[Purple Parrots Fan]

Babe the Ox was a good episode, I especially liked Joel's enthusiasm. I also liked the legend too of Paul Bunyan, very interesting and one of the better legends of Season 2. I also remember the temple games being a tad one sided, where Dorothy kind of sucked in her game, but Joel excelled in his. The win is also a tad overrated, for the same reasons you stated. But I still find Joel a respectable contestant and he deserved his win. At least he had some objectives in there, even though he sort of struggled with them. I definitely prefer Joel over Paula, Shane, Bobby, and Mitchell any day.

Overall, great review. I can't wait until you post your player rankings of Babe the Ox and the whole production day. I'll probably rank Discarded Seal next, I'll post it here sometime tonight. And PS, the Silver Snakes beat the Green Monkeys 1.5-0.5, not 1.5-1.

[The Red Jaguars]

Yes, I definitely take Joel over Shane, Bobby, Mitchell, Paula, Yakerra, and the            kids. And I think he would win at any layout in S2 too. Joel was very strong in this episode - got across the moat his first try, answered all three questions in the Steps, dominated his own temple game, and had a pretty strong temple performance. His final player score will probably be the highest out of all the teams that day. I will probably post by player rankings by tonight. I still need to sit through Ahmed Baba and Ivory Elephant, which are a borefest. *yawns*

And I definitely can't wait until your Ivan the Terrible review. I will save the details on that one for you to post. But I love that episode and I hope your final score of it is just as good as the final score I have in mind.  There are three episodes that I have in mind that I want to do next too - Mummified Hand, Ahmed Baba, or Alhambra. I am interested in seeing if Alhambra ranks as the worst episode on the show. And it will have to be done sooner or later.  But I think I will do Mummified Hand next because I have been wanting to do it for a long time. 

[Purple Parrots Fan]

Here it is, my review on "The Discarded Seal of Ivan the Terrible."

THE DISCARDED SEAL OF IVAN THE TERRIBLE

MOAT: 8/10

For this moat, the players had to cross by balancing on three islands and a plank. If you fell into the water, you had to start all over again. This was a pretty exciting round, and none of the teams had much trouble at all. The Orange Iguanas finished first, and the Green Monkeys finished last.

LEGEND: 7/10

The legend was about Ivan the Terrible, who wanted to change his name and stray away from his old name "Ivan the Kind." Ivan and advisor Krankoff kept thinking of names like "Ivan the Horrible," "Ivan the Miserable," etc. to which Ivan said "That's terrible." It was then Ivan declared "That's it!" and the name stuck. Naturally, he needed a new seal made and gave Krankoff the old seal as a souvenir. This was a decent legend in my opinion. I know it sounds lame to revolve a legend around name changing, but it was executed in a humorous way where it wasn't a total waste.

STEPS OF KNOWLEDGE: 8/10

The Steps of Knowledge were a good round, and just about all the teams were smart the whole way through. The only wrong answer was given by the Purple Parrots, where they thought Ivan the Terrible wanted "to change his attitude" as opposed to "change his name." Nonetheless, the Green Monkeys eventually joined the Orange Iguanas on the final step.

TEMPLE GAMES: 8/10

The temple games were an awesome match, with the Green Monkeys absolutely destroying the Orange Iguanas. In the first game, Elisa and Ashley had to spell out the "Terrible" in "Ivan the Terrible." Elisa beat out Ashley before the 60 seconds were up, as Ashley could only spell "Terrib." In the second game, Travis and Jimmy had to knock over Pizzaro's soldiers. Both players did well in this game, but Travis beat out Jimmy with about 10 seconds to go. In the final game, the teams had to throw rings at their partner, and rebuild the onion domes. The game was AGAIN finished before time ended and the Green Monkeys sweep the Orange Iguanas and go to the temple with 2 pendants! Literally all three games ended just before time ran out, and it was a temple game sweep by Travis and Elisa. That's amazing.

TEMPLE RUN: 9/10

This was by far the hardest layout in the shows history. Travis and Elisa were both fast and smart, didn't hesitate once, and STILL lost. Travis was one of the very few people to get back on the platform, and he breezed through the rest of the bottom floor with no trouble at all. He was removed from the temple in the Shrine, two rooms away from the Discarded Seal, with 1:15 left on the clock. Elisa goes in and blazes through his partners removal, assembls the monkey in quick fashion, and makes it to the Room of the Ancient Warriors with time ticking down. Unfortunately, a third temple guard was waiting there and totally stalls Elisa. Needless to say, her time ends as she tries the last armor. Stupid temple guard and crushing any chance this team had at reaching the Discarded Seal. I do love how when the credits roll, Elisa is still spinning around in one of the armors. And she's totally laughing it off too. Good to know she was a good sport about losing the way that she did.

FINAL VERDICT: 8/10

This was a great episode from beginning to end, and it was the first episode I ever saw on YouTube from a long time ago. And I've seen this one a million times, so it was easy for me to review this episode all from memory. Every round featured solid competition and I loved Elisa's enthusiasm throughout the whole episode. Especially during the temple run when she was cheering for Travis from the sidelines. It's such a shame this team lost, and I can't believe the production crew gave them a layout this impossible. If Travis and Elisa were given say.... Bent Shaving Pan's layout, they would've won for sure. I definitely recommend a rewatch of this episode, it's totally worth it.

[The Red Jaguars]

You pretty much came up with the final score that I would've came up for this episode.   "Ivan the Terrible" is a classic episode and the Green Monkeys were a great team. The moat was pretty creative and I think this was the only moat during that production day that was quick. I don't think any of the teams fell in? The legend was also pretty humorous and unusual at that. I didn't really expect this legend to be about how Ivan the Kind became Ivan the Terrible. The conversation between Ivan and Krankov was pretty witty too, although I expected more from the legend.

The temple games were very fun for Elisa's enthusiasm and the Green Monkeys dominance. It was actually nice to see the Orange Iguanas get dominated for once since they had very few temple game losses on the show. And it was a good feat also for Travis and Elisa to finish every single one of their games because normally each of those games they used are ones that you never see completed. The other episodes that day sure didn't have all their temple games completed. Unfortunately, Travis and Elisa got stuck in a production day where the producers decided to not give a grand prize out. Seriously, that layout was hard as hell. The Green Monkeys were a flawless team in the temple - Travis made it back to the platform, both players moved fast, and Elisa covered his path very well. They were so close to the Discarded Seal, but that last guard stalled Elisa and the ending was a heartbreaker. Too bad, they would've won on any other layout of S3 most likely. I honestly wouldn't have mind if you gave the temple run a 10 because it was a flawless performance and exciting and memorable experience.  

Overall, "Ivan the Terrible" is the best episode to end in a loss. Either that one, Polynesian Girl, or Henry Morgan were the best episodes ending in a loss. I liked this one the most due to flawless and dominating performance throughout the episode. And do not believe what people have to say about Elisa being a blabbermouth either. Her enthusiasm was authentic and this episode was great. I would recommend this episode too.          

So it looks like Billy the Kid next for you? My plan is to either do "Mummified Hand" or "Alhambra" next. I still need to finish Ahmed Baba and Ivory Elephant for my player rankings, but I got stalled with something else.   And both of those are boring that it is kind of hard wanting to watch them. Also, I changed the score for "Captain John Smith" and gave it a lower one. Likewise, I raised the score for "The Trojan Horseshoe" a little bit too.  

[Purple Parrots Fan]

Yeah, I'm doing Billy the Kid next, but I'll let you rank an episode next, since it is your turn. And good luck ranking Tall Turban and Ivory Elephant, I assume you'll have them up very soon. I already have an idea of how Joel will do, but I still want to see how Shane and Jamie rank. I know this seems like a lot to do, but it will be worth a read through at the end.

[The Red Jaguars]

It's actually not too time consuming at all. It usually takes an hour at most to do the player rankings, and about 45 minute at most to do the episode ones. The only thing that would keep me interested in Ahmed Baba is to see how Shane and Jackie rank altogether. Other than that, I always felt that episode was so boring and plain average. 

And I think I am going to do Alhambra next too and do Mummified Hand afterwards. Since Alhambra is considered the worst episode ever around here, I am interested in how it ranks. And I can knock out a shitfest at the same time. Although I think that Bifocal Monocle will rank lower than Alhambra, but I am not touching that one anytime soon.         

[Purple Parrots Fan]

Shane and Jamie you mean?

And I'm not touching Bifocal Monocle either. That's on my black list, and I swore never to watch it again. But I'd love to see if Alhambra is truly the worst episode ever. Whether or not your rating of it decides that, I still consider it the worst and is also on my black list.

[The Red Jaguars]

Well, I finally completed the dread "Alhambra" episode review. All I have to say that I am glad to get this episode over with.  I am sure the score won't disappoint anyone.

THE KEYS TO THE ALHAMBRA

MOAT: 3/10

This had to be the most blandest moat ever used on the show. Basically, the first player had to swim across the moat with a rope in their hands and tie the rope around the pole. The second player then had to cross by using the rope over their head. The moat moved by pretty quick, which is expected for such an uninspiring moat. The Silver Snakes rang in first while the other three teams followed close behind.

LEGEND: 4/10

Alhambra was a beautiful palace that was located in the Moors of Spain. The legend talks about a young Queen Isabella and her husband who ruled most of Spain, except for an area south of the Moors. Queen Isabella wanted the mythical jewels and treasures of Alhambra, so she battled for it for 10 years before the King gave her the Keys to it. According to the legend, the Alhambra was designed by a magician and only an individual can only unlock the treasures of Alhambra if they are pure of heart. Isabella tried unlocking every room of the temple, before she threw away the Keys...

The legend was pretty boring this episode, but it wasn't terrible like some of the other S1 legends. The legend tried to fit so many things in a 2 minute segment though. Like the part of the magician casting a spell over Alhambra felt like it was randomly thrown in to make it more interesting. Plus, the artifact was pretty lame too.

STEPS OF KNOWLEDGE: 2.5/10

The Steps of Knowledge was pretty uneventful like the legend. The Red Jaguars got 3 questions answered correctly within the first four questions asked. The Silver Snakes were bad at this Steps too. They got two questions incorrectly, but they still moved onto the temple games. There was no form of excitement either during this round and Kirk and Olmec sounded awkward. Furthermore, a majority of the questions asked had nothing to do with the actual legend.

TEMPLE GAMES: 3/10

The temple games featured the Silver Snakes pitted against the Red Jaguars. There was Steve, 14, and Lisa, 13, of the Red Jaguars; and Rodney, 14, and Leslie, 14, of the Silver Snakes. That's right, no personal interview questions in this episode. This temple game round is pretty infamous for the Red Jaguars lucking out in their last temple game and winning the tiebreaker due to the Silver Snakes answering incorrectly. The temple games themselves were lackluster in performance anyways.

Temple Game #1 - Decorate Alhambra

In the first temple game, Leslie and Leah had to climb up the wall and place pieces of tile to decorate Alhambra. While the concept for this game was interesting, I hated the rules used behind it. The girls had to align the patterns correctly on the tiles for it to count. Why were they so picky on this rule in S1? Oh well, Leslie won this temple game within the last few seconds while Lisa was getting ready to put her final piece up.

Temple Game #2 - Unlock Alhambra's Doors

Steve and Rodney had to climb up a slippery water slide with keys on their head. At the top of the water slides were three key holes where they must place their keys. The player that gets the most keys into their correct holes will be the winner. Rodney won this temple game rather easily and Steve kind of just gave up on getting his last key to the top. He even dropped his key while trying to climb up. And you can tell that Rodney was not completing the games while on his knees. He was walking of the slope with his feet. I am surprised Kirk didn't catch this?

Temple Game #3 - Attack on Alhambra

Okay, the premise of this game made no sense. One player was suppose to be Isabella from the legend and one is suppose to be the King of Alhambra? And the King of Alhambra is suppose to catch the balls? Weren't they enemies? Basically, the female players had to throw velcro balls at their partners while their partners must catch them with their bodies. The Red Jaguars win the final temple game and force the first ever tiebreaker.

The tiebreaker in this episode was a load of crap. The Silver Snakes answered Kirk's tiebreaker question incorrectly, so that automatically means that the Red Jaguars go to the temple?! Season 1 had so many flaws, and this one of the glaring ones that was luckily fixed in later seasons. I know it's not Lisa and Steve's fault for the tiebreaker working this way. But the way they went to the temple was a load of crap. They only won their final temple game and then go to the temple with the other team who was more dominant getting the answer wrong? This temple appearance was handed to them on a Silver Platter! 

TEMPLE RUN: 1/10

Brace yourself everyone, you are about to witness one of the worst temple runs on the whole show. The first 30 seconds of the run is fine, but everything goes downhill after that. Steve was one of the fastest runners on the show, and he made it through his fifth room in under 30 seconds (granted his path was incredibly simple). Leah, on the other hand, was quite the worst second runner either. She had 2:30 to herself and doesn't even make any progress towards the artifact. When she makes her way into the Tomb of the Ancient Kings, the golden door to the Shrine doesn't seem to open when she tries it out. So she spends the next two minutes screwing around the temple and backtracking to the entrance. Yes Lisa, running into the room you entered will sure make you progress. In the end, she just spent 2:30 running around and only entered one new room - the Heart Room. And that was not even progress towards the artifact.

Furthermore, Kirk Fogg was extremely annoying in this temple run. His commentary was so annoying and didn't make any sense. He called Lisa a "cool customer" and said then said that "she pulled her socks up because she is a cool". What is wrong with you Kirk? His lamest line though was when he said "They are tangled, oh what a might web we've weaved" when Lisa was in the Spider's Lair. Apparently, both Lisa AND Kirk needed to get it together in this run. I was originally going to give the temple run a higher score due to Steve and feeling a little bad for Lisa who got confused in the Tomb of the Ancient Kings. Then I felt like the lowest score possible was fitting for one of the worst temple runners on the show. What a pathetic and sad attempt.

FINAL VERDICT: 2.7/10

This episode is often labeled as one of the worst episodes on the whole show by the Legends fanbase. And you know what? Listen to what the fans sAY! I really think this is the worst episode ever aired on the show. There is nothing good or redeemable about this episode at all. You could try to find something, but it would probably be something trivial. Steve and Leah are the poster child of an undeserving temple team. They didn't help their case when they blew their load in the temple! As a Red Jaguars fan, not only am I embarrassed what these two did to my team, but I am also embarrassed on what they did to my favorite game show. The only reason to ever watch this episode is for completion! Otherwise, stay away from it and you will thank me too for that!

[Purple Parrots Fan]

Wow, only a 2.7? Fuck. This really is the worst episode ever, and your review just reminded me all over again why I always skip it. I've only seen the full episode twice, and I don't intend on watching it ever again, not even for player rankings. This is why I hate the Red Jaguars, their episodes are always my least favorite. I'm not sure how much better the Silver Snakes would've fared, but they probably wouldn't have been as pathetic as Lisa was. If only they didn't choke at the tiebreaker.

[Purple Parrots Fan]

Well, here's another review for you guys. I've decided to switch gears and do "The Broken Wing if Icarus" instead.

THE BROKEN WING OF ICARUS

MOAT: 7/10

In this moat, the players had to swing across using a rope. Much like they did in the Enormous Ring episode. The Silver Snakes and the Green Monkeys got across with little trouble, with the other two teams ringing in not long after. Also, everyones shirts were wet before the round even started. Maybe the teams had to start over due to struggling in the moat? Nonetheless, it was a good round, just not as exciting because the round didn't last long at all.

LEGEND: 8/10

The legend was about Dædalus, who wanted to teach his son Icarus how to fly. However, Dædalus warned Icarus not to fly too high or else his wings would melt. Unfortunately, Icarus ignored his advice, and flew higher and higher to the sun, which got hotter and hotter and melted his wings. Icarus ended up plunging into the ocean and one of his wings eventually floated ashore. I liked this legend a lot, and I especially like legends that dealt with Greek mythology. They were always the most accurate, and this legend didn't disappoint.

STEPS OF KNOWLEDGE: 6/10

The Steps of Knowledge were over in a heartbeat as the Silver Snakes and the Green Monkeys double swept the steps. I happen to like double sweeps, but it just makes the round a lot less exciting, and very rushed. Hence why I only gave this round a "6."

TEMPLE GAMES: 7/10

The temple games were a decent and close round. In the first game, April and Kevin had to place birds on the ceiling above them. Kevin kept knocking his birds off, but April had no problem as she kept 5 birds hanging, winning the game for her team. Just as the game ended, Kirk joked to April "That's a good position there," referring to April's awkward standing position after the game ended. Silly Kirk. In the second game, Jason and Lisa had to grab feathers, and put it in their bin using the oh so common rotating lever game. Jason kept a solid lead the entire time and beat Lisa 7-4. In the final game, the teams had to meet up with each other, take a feather foot to foot from their partner, then attach it to their shirt. At the end of the game, Kirk almost declared the game, and NOT the pendant score a tie. Then he noticed the extra feathers on Kevin's shirt, and declared the pendant score a tie. For the tiebreaker, the Silver Snakes choked by saying "Mount Olympus" and not "Atlantis" were destroyed in a volcanic eruption that also took out Crete. April got the latter answer, and thus won a free trip to the temple, much like Steve and Lisa did in Alhambra. However, at least the Green Monkeys here actually got the tiebreaker question. And didn't weasel their way into by winning automatically like Steve and Lisa did. -_- Oh well, still a decent match, but the tiebreaker in the end kind of dragged the score down a little.

TEMPLE RUN: 6/10

The temple run is yet another famous one. Jason had a solo victory basically handed to him, but he totally blew it by taking his sweet ass time exiting. I mean, people pick on Tony from Billy the Kid for take a long time exiting too, but at least he knew what he was doing up until then. Jason just sucked the whole way through. He just had no idea what he was doing. Quite truthfully, I didn't find this run exciting at all, it was very frustrating. I can't say it was uneventful though, and it was a memorable, nailbiter finish. It was also the closest anyone came to winning without actually doing so. But this loss is not heartbreaking at all due to how slow Jason was. Which is the reason I only gave it a "6."

FINAL VERDICT: 6.8/10

Overall, this was a pretty good episode, despite the frustrating finish the temple run had. The Green Monkeys and the Silver Snakes were 1 and 2 all day long, until the tiebreaker where the Silver Snakes choked. Seriously, you would think "Atlantis" would be an obvious answer. Even the very first time I saw this episode, I knew the answer. You would think a team that outright swept the steps would get that no problem. Alas, the Green Monkeys ended up winning a trip to the temple and almost won. If only Jason didn't hesitate so much and take forever exiting. I'm not sure how much better the Silver Snakes would've fared, but I doubt they would've done a worse job. Either way, I still recommend this episode, especially if you're into Greek Mythology and actually like the temple run despite the outcome.

[The Red Jaguars]

Good choice of an episode to choose! Icarus was definitely an entertaining and good episode to watch through out. I am curious about the wet team shirts in the moat. It happened in Nostradamus too, but I don't think the players in Dolley Madison or Polynesian Girl had wet shirts before the moat start. The legend was good and interesting also. And I also very much enjoy legends about Green Mythology. Legends like this one and "Broken Trident" were very interesting choices for legends.

The Steps of Knowledge had the rare double sweep. This hardly happened at all on the show. The only other episode I recall was the "Mummified Hand" episode. The temple games were decent also, and it's always hilarious when a girl beats a guy in the individual games. The temple games pretty much pertained to the legend too, so they were decent. I always thought the final game was a little tricky to get those feathers to stick to the other player's feet. The tiebreaker question was kind of a fail. How did the Silver Snakes not now it was Atlantis for the answer? At least April answered it correctly. And I'd rather see a team who won their individual games over just their team game in the temple.

The temple run though pisses me off. Jason was so slow and was backtracking into the wrong directions. He had an easy temple layout and still managed to lose in the temple. -_- He was a mediocre player and couldn't even bring the Broken Wing out of the temple with almost a minute on the clock. His temple run literally ended behind Olmec. If he had just a couple of more seconds, they would've won. April looked kind of piss at the end of the run too. But still, it wasn't a terrible run and at least it was sort of a nailbiter at the end. I think a 6 is the best score to give this temple run.

Overall, good review and good choice for an episode. This is one of those episodes where everything about the episode is good except the temple run. Even then, the temple run is decent and memorable. My next episode? After reviewing "Alhambra", I am looking for a good episode. Looking at the highlighted list, I think "Nostradamus" and "Mummified Hand" are the next choices. Maybe I will do Nostradamus next. 

[Purple Parrots Fan]

You should totally do Nostradamus next. What a coincidence that Nostradamus was filmed just before Icarus too. We'd be reviewing episodes filmed back to back! And after the abomination that was Alhambra, you owe it to yourself to review an awesome episode. It should rank high too, since it was very exciting the whole way through. Plus, you've been wanted to rank that episode for months now.

[The Red Jaguars]

Yeah, I haven't ranked many of the Orange Iguanas episodes yet, so I think Nostradamus would be a good start. Actually, all those episodes that day would be fun to cover. Dolley Madison and Polynesian Girl are very fun and solid episodes. So you can't go wrong with any episode that entire production day. My plan for the next three episodes: Nostradamus -> Mummified Hand -> Leonardo Da Vinci.

[Purple Parrots Fan]

I'm not sure which episodes I'm gonna rank next. I would love to do Dolley Madison, which is also from the same day as Icarus. I also wanted to do Billy the Kid somewhere down the road, and didn't you want to rank Very Tall Turban in this thread too? But, it's your turn to rank an episode, and I most look forward to Nostradamus as your next episode.

[The Red Jaguars]

I don't know about Ahmed Baba, I have finished it half-way through that episode for my player rankings and I almost literally fell asleep while watching it.  Seriously, the Green Monkeys were such a boring team and they barely won their team game in that episode. I know I am hard on that episode sometimes, but it really is a snore fest.  I will eventually cover that one down the road. But Nostradamus is the next one for sure. 

Dolley Madison is a great episode also. The Orange Iguanas were a fun team and this is literally the only good Orange Iguana episode ending in a loss next to "Blue Pearl". I think I might even use the temple run for this episode in my newly created "Does this temple run get a bad reputation" thread next.