I finally finished Blackbeard!
And good riddance too, because this episode was horrible as hell.
I swear when some of these Legends episodes were really bad, the whole episode had to suck. This episode was no exception. This also had to be my longest episode review too because there was too much to talk about. I am so glad to get this episode done. -_-
BLACKBEARD'S TREASURE MAP
MOAT: 2/10
The first players on each team had to pull themselves across the moat while floating inside of their innertubes. Once they made it to the other side, they had to take their tubes and throw it to their partners. Once their partners grabbed on to the tubes, then they had to pull themselves to the other side the same way. The first four teams that made it across would go onto the Steps of Knowledge. The idea used for this moat was very bland and boring. Not only that, but it seemed to give the kids a lot of trouble throwing it across too. It was one of those moats where it took along time for the last team to make it across. Altogether, this was a very boring and lackluster moat.
LEGEND: 8/10
The meanest, most ornery, and the ugliest Pirate to sail to the seven seas was Blackbeard. He tied ribbons around his long black beard and hid fuses under his hat to make himself look more frightening. When he felt dull, he would set fire to his own ship or shoot one of his own crew members to keep them on their feet. Blackbeard liked attacking Spanish ships and stealing all of their jewels. If a hostage took too long to take off their ring, he would cut off their finger. Once, he even made a man eat his own ear. He would take his treasure to shore and hide them with the help of a few men. Sometimes, the men who helped him never came back. According to legend, one of his fourteen wives held his Treasure Map and it eventually made it's way to the temple.
This episode featured a pretty graphic and gruesome legend. I actually found this legend to be interesting for this very reason. A lot of the legends featured on the show would sugarcoat the gruesome details, but this legend did a good job detailing how fierce Blackbeard was. However, unlike most S1 legends, this one failed to use a dressed intern as the historical figure for this legend. Why? I am not sure, but this episode was filled with a lot of quirks. So I had to deduct one point for that. Other than that, this was a pretty neat story.
STEPS OF KNOWLEDGE: 3/10
This Steps of Knowledge round was the exact reason why I could not stand this round in Season 1. Olmec threw out a couple of questions that were very close to being correct, but because they were not the exact answers as his own, he didn't count them. For example, one of the questions he asked was, "What did Blackbeard use to tie around his beard?". The Orange Iguana girl answered "Red Ribbon", but the correct answer was "Bow" and Olmec still counted it as incorrect. He did the exact same thing for a couple of other questions. As a result, we had a pretty long Steps round. Yet, if this was Season 3, these players' answers would've been counted as correct. So S3 were very lucky on how Kirk and Olmec were generous about their answers. What saved this round from getting a really low score was that it was actually very close and all four teams eventually made it to the second to last step. The Red Jaguars and Silver Snakes eventually advanced onto the next round. On a side note, the Steps of Knowledge music ended before the round was over. This is a recurring theme with bad editing in this episode.
TEMPLE GAMES: 5/10
The
Silver Snakes featured
Hector, who was 12 and liked to play the trumpet, and his partner
Karisa, who was 11 years old and wanted to be a teacher. The
Red Jaguars featured
James, who was 11 and played as a forward in soccer, and
Sabrina, who was 11 and a goalkeeper in soccer.
Temple Game #1 - Load the Cannons
In the first temple game, Hector and James had to push their cannonballs to the top of the ramp with their backs and load it into their cannons. Once they get the first one up, they had to do the same thing two more times. As time goes on, water will gush out from the top of the ramp and make it harder for the contestants to climb to the top. The first player to place all three cannonballs at the will win. James ended up being more dominant in this temple game, and won it 2-1. For the most part, the temple games were okay. I liked the Pirate theme that was used, but the competition was pretty boring and sucky. It felt like the best of the worst would go onto the temple games.
Temple Game #2 - Buried Treasure
In the second temple game, Karisa and Sabrina had to bury through rubble to find Blackbeard's treasure. Once they find a piece of treasure, then they must climb to the top of the shaft and place it into their bin. The girl that had the most pieces of treasure after 60 seconds would be the winner. Both girls struggled in this temple game when it came to climbing, and the final score was a 2-2 tie. This put the Red Jaguars up 1-0.5
Temple Game #3 - Raise the Jolly Roger
The final team game had the two teams assembling Blackbeard's Jolly Roger flag. Both teams had to work together to assemble his flag by having one player grab a piece of the flag and placing it onto the top of the pole. When placing the flag pieces, they must match the correct number with the correct panel. If not, then that piece will not count. The team that assembles the most pieces of the flag after 60 seconds will win. In the end, the Red Jaguars and Silver Snakes tie 4-4 a piece. But with two pendants, the Red Jaguars go onto the temple games.
EDITING: -1
I almost never do this for most episode reviews, but this episode deserves it for the really bad editing. There were just too many bad shots in this episode that it made it look really crappy. Even Belshazzar and Dead Man's Hand had better editing than Blackbeard.
I had to deduct a point for the very poor editing because it was just very bad. Here are some standout moments from this episode.
- During the moat, one of the female players can be seen picking her butt.
- The legend for this episode lacks a historical figure shot in the moat like all of the other S1 episodes.
- The Steps of Knowledge music ends before the round is over.
- The temple run featured some bad shots of the camera panning out of the temple where you can see parts of the set.
- The ending lacks any credits of some sort.
- This episode is two minutes longer than any other episode on the show.
TEMPLE RUN: 1/10
This episode featured by far one of the worst temple runs ever on the show. Sabrina was very challenged player in the temple and she only made it through 5 rooms in 3 minutes. How can that be you ask? She just didn't know what she was doing at all. She originally starts low in the Cave of Sighs and granted access to the Wheel Room. After lifting the stone slab up to reveal the door to the Room of Harmonic Convergence, Sabrina tries pressing the actuator next to the door but it does not open. So she is forced to backtrack to the Room of the Three Gargoyles and try to take a different route. If you watch this temple run more closely though, you can tell that Sabrina did not press the actuator hard enough. I really think the door would've opened to the Room of Harmonic Convergence, but Sabrina was too retarded to press the button the right way.
After taking the Troubled Bridge with very little time left, she eventually makes her way to the Heart Room where she has trouble figuring out where to go next. With the clock winding down, Sabrina literally just gives up and starts walking back towards the temple gates. Seriously, she turns around and walks back to the entrance.
Sabrina was a horrible contestant and one of the worst players on the show. This is easily one of the worst temple runs ever. The only worst one I would say is the "Golden Cricket Cage" one.
I can guarantee you that 99% of any of the other contestants that this show featured would've done much better than Sabrina. Please do yourself a favor and try not to gouge your eyes out like I almost did after watching this abomination.
FINAL VERDICT: 3.6/10
"Blackbeard" is a horrible episode and one of the worst episodes ever featured on the show. To clear one thing up, this was NOT the first episode ever taped. So it will not get any sympathy from me for having early quirks. That honors belongs to "The Golden Cup of Belshazzar", which was ten times better than this crapfest. This episode was definitely taped on the same day as the other S1L5 episodes. The reason why it is labeled "Episode 1" is either because this episode was the first planned episode ever and got scraped for a later production day, or it was the first episode edited. Whichever it was, it was not one of the first episodes taped like the other S1L1 episodes.
Aside from that, this episode is pure garbage. It was so cringeworthy and almost all of the rounds were cringeworthy. The only round I liked was the legend, which saves this episode from being ranked in the low 2's range like Alhambra and Bifocal Monocle. The temple run was very pathetic and it makes Season 1 look very bad. I would say only watch this episode for completion and never touch it again. I have only watched three times in my 23 years lifespan, and one of those reasons was to write this review.
Topic: Legends Episode Ranking System - COMPLETE (Read 87651 times)
